Am I talking about when the music starts? No. Who walks when? Nope. When the officiant asks everyone to be seated? Not quite.

Let’s consider a completely hypothetical situation. 

The bridal party arrival. 

Suppose the groomsmen, family members, officiant, vendors, and guests have all arrived on time. In that case, the bride and wedding party should already be on-site and preparing for the ceremony—ideally at least 10 minutes before the scheduled start time.

Are there exceptions? Of course. Emergencies happen. Traffic happens. Dresses malfunction, buttons pop off, and sometimes a wedding day simply refuses to cooperate.

But let’s say, hypothetically, that none of those things happened. Now imagine an outdoor wedding in the middle of summer. It is extremely hot, the humidity is over 90%, there is no shade, and no water has been provided. Guests are seated outside in those conditions waiting for the ceremony to begin.

Uncomfortable? Absolutely.

Potentially dangerous? Yes.

Now imagine that the bride and wedding party arrive not five or ten minutes late, but more than 45 minutes after the ceremony was scheduled to begin.

This is one of my biggest frustrations as a planner—and one that, if I can help it, will NOT happen.

When your guests make the effort to arrive on time out of respect for you and your wedding, their time and comfort deserve that same consideration. They have rearranged schedules, traveled, dressed for the occasion, and come to celebrate with you.

A ceremony start time is not simply a suggestion. Being a few minutes behind is understandable. Keeping an entire group of guests waiting for nearly an hour—particularly in extreme heat—is something very different and dangerous.

Build extra time into your wedding-day schedule. Arrive early. If you do not have a planner, designate someone responsible for keeping the wedding party on schedule. And if something unavoidable does happen, communicate it as quickly as possible so guests are not left wondering what is going on.

Because while weddings rarely run perfectly to the minute, respecting your guests’ time and comfort should always be part of the plan.

Did I plan this hypothetical wedding? Absolutely not.

Disclaimer: This situation may or may not have been hypothetical and that is a secret I will never tell.